Swansea, 13th February 2013.


Benca, mae*!

I’ve just got a phone call from Brazil. I imagine you know what it is about, but I’ll write the very short conversation here anyway…

(Viber ringing)
Dani: Wow! That’s early… (it’s 8:06 am in Swansea, 6:06 am in Brazil.)
Dani: Oi, fufu (Isabela)! How you doing?
Isa: Oi, Dani. (deep, serious voice) Dani, dad has just phoned…

Now, here’s me thinking that one of dad’s (very old) sisters has died.

Dani: Ok… What’s happened?
Isa: Dani, mum has passed away.
Dani: What? (Shock. Sobs. Heartache.)
Isa: Dani, Dani, stay calm.
Dani: Bel, I need to phone Craig. I’ll call you later.

Sobs. Breathlessness. I can’t feel the floor under my feet.

Mother, I was alone in the school when I heard the news. I had arrived, turned on the lights, boiled the kettle, made myself a coffee, filled up my bottle with water and had just sat at my desk.

I couldn’t believe it – I still can’t. It just didn’t seem real.

I phoned Craig straight away. He was in work. He couldn’t believe it either, Mother. He said:
‘I’m going home now. Catch the first train back. I’ll meet you at home. I’ll book your flights.’

Mother, I have to say, he’s very good in a crisis. Very proactive, if you know what I mean.

He had everything ready when I got home. My bus to London and flights to Brazil booked. My passport ready next to my suitcase, which I managed to pack in less than 10 minutes!
I helped him book my flight from Sao Paulo to Uberlandia, had a shower and we left for the bus station.
I won’t be there in time to see you, Mother. I won’t be there in time to kiss you goodbye. L And it hurts.
Mother, why? Why did you have to go so fast?
I love you.

 * In Portuguese, Your blessing, Mother.

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